Confidentiality sucks

I hate this. Most of the things I want to blog about, especially the stuff that really eats at me and causes me stress, I can’t even talk about because it’s covered by non-disclosure agreements.

Every now and then, I think about blogging “anonymously” but that goes against my personal principles. There’s no such thing as anonymity. Eventually, somehow, the dots get connected and then what has been said is out there.

How does one crowdsource wisdom on matters like this? Sure, I talk to my therapist and my family … but sometimes it feels like it would be useful to cast a wider net.

I guess I’ll just sit here and wring my hands and just let you all know that there’s plenty I wish I could share, but can’t. Argh!


  1. Lillith//Raeyn says

    This is why I’m a big fan of honesty – lies come back and bite the liar in the ass, and I cannot understand why people think they won’t get caught at it! I do empathise with being forced to not say things – I took my top secret clearance seriously when I was still in the Air Force! :)

  2. What I do is speak in analogies. Like, my current job wanting me to do less of what they hired for me to do and more maintenance and support was likened to “I was hired to race the car, not change the oil.”

    I also make up names for those who I would rather not mention by name. I can get really creative with that.

    Of course this is soon to be my former job, so soon I’m not really going to care. But still.

    • I’ve thought about making up fictitious names and talking indirectly about things, but I’m having a hard time being sufficiently vague as to not really disclose anything sensitive but at the same time communicate what I really want to talk about.

      Maybe I’ll give it a try …

  3. I was going to suggest the same thing regarding metaphors…

    Here’s a thought for you that may help, may not. Part of your energy around this is that you definitely want to point the finger a bit – otherwise your frustration wouldn’t be coming out so strongly. You’d be mildly irritated. Your sense of justice and right practice are equally strong and bumping up against each other, creating personal inner angst.

    Hehe, in a nutshell, this is personal. :)

    Consider this – write the key details down, just for yourself, knowing for sure that you intend to share this with the world at a later date when it’s not such a hot topic. Part of you will feel ‘why bother’ but,it’ll give you some relief.

    Then ponder back to some other thing that happened a while back from *now* and write about that, changing the names and using metaphor where you feel appropriate. (many a best selling revelatory novel was created in this way, but it’s never done in the moment)

    You won’t be so charged so you’ll have the clear perspective you need in your position, AND you’ll be doing the right thing so you’ll get your happy-nom of knowing that you’ve shared something that may save a lot of people great grief.

    • Akira Dawn: Thanks for the comment – you bring up some good points.

      In this particular case, I wanted to write about something that was timely that I was trying to get advice about, but I couldn’t disclose what I felt were necessary details.

      This kind of situation has happened before, and I still don’t really have a good solution. Writing in vague metaphors might enable me to write about things in a very general way, but I don’t know how to write in such a way that will enable folks to respond with specific advice that I could use.

      Just more to think about, I guess …

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